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I'm not sure where to start with this one, but suffice it to say my BF of 3 years and I have hit a sex-low (frequency-wise mostly) and it's been like this for about 6 months. I basiy had been telling him as gently as I could (I'm not exactly your most tactful girl) that he needed to stop "performing" and start paying more attention and relaxing into the moment and stop pinning me down. While I do like being pinned down (no violence or BDSM here at all), I also moving freely and touching him as well. Around that time, he was going through some really tough shit in therapy and with work, and things started going downhill. He also got really hostile with me during that time. We're now in couples therapy and that's helping a lot. Yes, cheating has occurred to me, but I really don't think that's it for various reasons. Anyway, my question is this: I know I hurt his ego with those requests and he felt like a failure (though he's amazing in bed) and I want things to heat up again. He's never been in a LTR this, so he also not know what to do after the "performance" stage wears off. Any help would be damn cool.
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